I Need the Gym but My Son Needs Me

January 1^st 2013. This is the day when I realized that I was 11 Kg more than my ideal weight (70 Kg). So, what should I do about it? Simple, LOOSE WEIGHT. Is that easy? Thought it was… I began by eating less, going for a walk early morning (at least 3 times in a week), going for a walk after dinner (once a week) and some attempts to climb a hillock over the weekends. Another attempt – Kellogs Special K Challenge. But, that works only for Lara I guess.

Did this help? No way! I was still the same.

February 25^th 2013. I decided to join a gym and I really did. On the first day of my gym, I was 81kgs (embarrassed). I also went for a personal trainer to keep myself motivated. This worked! Losing weight in this way is not easy, it is really not. I got up in the morning at 6 - prepared tiffin for the family,  board the bus at 8, returned from office at 7 in the evening and then went to the gym at 7:30 pm. In the gym, the instructor torchers you as much as he can to squeeze out those fat cells from your body. You try and make him happy by running on that trade mill to his satisfaction and picking up weights till you drop. Don’t forget that I also “tried” to follow the diet restriction to an extent I could. At times I gave up, of course. But, all is well if it ends well.

June 5^th 2013. I lost a hefty 7 Kg. I has started looking trim and had a slight glow on my face. In the morning, when I saw myself in the mirror (while I was brushing) I felt that I had started looking younger. At least I thought so! The best part of going slim is when your colleagues who don’t even know you say that there is a difference. For me the golden question was “Have you lost weight?” People like me who have been overweight throughout their lives will understand the importance of this question, especially when strangers ask it.

All was going well and I was happy!

June 6^th 2013 – the day of realization. There was a parents meeting at my son’s (Aadi) school. Before going for this meeting I had not dreamt that it will change my life completely. I met his teacher and she mentioned that Aadi is good in everything except one. He is slow at writing. If his writing speed does not improve this year (Sr. KG) then he will have a tough time in standard 1. I asked for a solution. She said that I had to make him practice writing and that I cannot take his practice after I return from the gym at 9 pm. That will not work. He needs to complete his homework and writing practice at least around 7 in the evening (that is the earliest I can return from office).

What next? I came home and had a word with my hubby. He had the same thing to say and I realized that he and Aadi’s teacher were right. In my struggle to lose weight, I cannot come home late every night and make him do his school work when he is done for the day and wants to go to bed. I then realized those smacking sessions tagged with homework so that he writes fast, ever since I had joined the gym. That is not done Pradnya! This has to change.

What next? The maa ki mamta in me was reborn and I decided to quit the gym. That was the only way when I could give him time after 7 pm every day to complete his homework and practice writing fast. Readers of this article must be thinking, BIG DEAL! What is so great in this?

But, let me tell you something, this is really not easy. When you know that you have to climb 11 steps to reach your goal, you climb 7 and then you realize that the most precious person in your life needs you and for him, you have to climb down those steps…not easy. Of course, you do it but you have the feeling of erasing your efforts that you had put in for climbing those 7 steps.

What next? I got frustrated for a while but time is the best medicine.

June 12^th 2013 (the day when I am writing this blog) I have decided that there are only 4 more Kg to loose and gym is not the only place in the world to achieve this. I will follow a healthy diet, walk, eliminate those elevators, avoid junk food, drink plenty of water, not get carried away by those dominos pizzas, pani puri chats, pav bhaji’s, mutton biryani’s, etc. etc. etc., and try to go to the gym at least twice in a week.

I am sure, this will help me get to that 70 Kg ideal weight. I am praying that it works and you pray for me too.

I am sure the sequel of this blog will be when I actually lose those extra 4 Kg.

I Created a Scene…

I decided to go shopping for my birthday on a Saturday and was excited about it! I wanted to go alone - aking my four year old son Aadi along with me for shopping was not a good idea. But there was no one to take care of him at home and I didn’t want to give up shopping for this reason. I decide to take him along with me. After I entered the mall, I bought a coke for Aadi so that he does not bother me and we headed straight towards the female apparel section.

Aadi was trying to play peek-a-boo with me by hiding behind the stock of kurtis hung all around the store. After a while I was so busy shopping that I forgot Aadi was with me. I was somewhere in the middle of the floor when I heard Aadi crying loudly. I rushed to look for him. When I saw what had happened I turned furious. Aadi was sitting in the middle of the floor with the glass of coke spilt on his clothes.

I thought to myself, as always he must have been mischievious and purposely emptied the glass - and is now crying out for rescue. He knew that if I come to know about it, I will scold him. Crying was his usual rescue technique.

Everyone gathered around him and was looking for his parents. That was so embarrassing… before I could think of anything, I went and slapped on his cheek; my finger prints were visible on his fair skin. “Why did you do this?”, I screamed. Before he could explain, I had smacked him one more time on his back. He got choked. I picked him up and headed straight towards the lift to get out of there. When I was waiting for the lift to open I was thinking to mysel - kids embarrass us so much…I cannot even do simple things like shopping without any hassle…people without kids are really lucky…who the hell is he to spoil my weekend plan in this way.

There were lot of thoughts in my mind, when someone patted on my back. I turned around to see a middle aged lady with her mentally challenged daughter on a wheelchair. Her daughter must be a teenager but had a toddler like expressions on her face. The lady said, “Please don’t be angry with him. He was just playing and tumbled down all of a sudden and the drink slopped on him. It was not his mistake, he was crying out for you as he must have got scared. For him, you are the only protection.” The lift opened and she pushed the wheelchair to get her daughter in.

With those words, I got blank and could not think of anything. What was I thinking about my son? Do I even have the right to think of something like that? How dare I could think that my son will embarrass me, in fact he is the most precious gift God gave me! Aadi turned my face towards him and said, “Sorry mummy, I will never do that again…” and hugged me. For a moment my feet got paralyzed and I had to lean towards the wall. The feeling of my son apologizing for the mistake he did not even make was so strong that I had tears in my eyes. I hugged him back and kissed him. He was smiling at me and said, “Let’s buy your birthday dress now.” I smiled and we went inside to continue our shopping.

That day changed my point of view towards being a mother. Children never embarrass you…in fact they are the ones who make you proud parents.